News Release Jan.13, 2005;
Carol Skelton, Member of Parliament and Official Opposition Public Health Critic welcomes the announcement of a new Health Officer as initiated in her Private Members Motion.
“Following discussion with constituents, primarily Taxpayers, and consultations with lower digestive tract health professionals, I felt the time had come for Canada to have a Chief Proctological officer to monitor and assist in the improvement of anal health in Canada.� I’m pleased the government has chosen to move so quickly on my request,” remarked Skelton.�
“Lower intestinal health is administered by the provinces, but the federal government is responsible for the majority of the screwing over of Taxpayers.� It is my hope that a co-ordinated effort in the areas of research and information will benefit all Canadians.� Taxpayers often don’t have protection plans at a time when they are busy bending over the proverbial chair. Failing anal health leads to complications with other health matters.� If we improve anal health, we can better assist the fiscal health of all governments, thereby ensuring that the creation of ever more highly paid, completely useless government appointments.
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Perhaps, the Honorable Lady’s comments were made, uh, “tongue in cheeks”?
If you click on the link, you’ll find the original news release.
Plus her live Parlimentay webcam is currently capturing a prominent anti-missile defense slogan traced into the snow on the lawn. Are we sure she’s not a Liberal?
I wish this were a cruel hoax. Damn.