31 Replies to “We Stand on Guard for Thee”

  1. Back when I was a young lad fresh in the Army, my penis was nicknamed ICBM — Impressive Circumference Banging Member.

    1. Fortunately, you never travelled abroad so it didn’t become Intercontinental.

  2. Waiting for the one on the size of boobs and the diameter of nipples (and their colour, too).

  3. Possibly the ethnic Chinese part of the Canadian population is holding the average down.

    I make this statement to highlight the stupidity of such studies. People got paid good money to produce this?

    1. So this based on “self reporting.” Yeah, that’s gonna make it sooooo accurate. Maybe Canadian men are just much better liars than American men….

      1. It can’t possibly be based on self reporting. If it were, you would see 8 and 9 averages.
        You know, the inches self reported by hardy Canucks like me.
        Right, honey?

  4. That place on the “member” list has nothing to do with a certain prime minister acting like one all the time, does it?

    1. First thing that came to mind: With all the dickhead politicians we have in Canada, the average should be a lot higher than 12th.

  8. As a Canadian, my biggest complaint is that the water is too cold to piss into a river from a bridge.
    Now that that’s outta the way….
    Think about the institutions that try to warp kids into sexualized freaks, and why they would do such a thing.
    Lots of big multi-national corps, most of the western governments…
    Something truly evil is at large in the world.

  10. We’re number 12 ! We’re number 12 !
    … wow ….
    Self reported . ..
    Can we make this proof of climate change?
    Go AGW go… it’s the only possible explanation given the prevailing data from warmer climes.
    Perhaps a self reporting Olympics is in the offing for Montreal.
    12th, is that, what,… spelter?

  11. A golfer was ashamed of being in the shower with his buddies after a round. He seemed to be under-equipped compared to the others. One day after a round, one of his buddies asked what his issue was. He explained the issue.
    “Does it work?” asked his buddy.
    He answered in the affirmative.
    His buddy responded, “How would you like to trade one that works for one that looks great in the shower?”

  13. Who cares?
    On our wedding night my wife looked at me and said “Who do you thing you’re going to be pleasuring with that little thing?”
    I replied: “Myself!”

    1. Oscar Wilde considered Niagara Falls as a bride’s second big disappointment. No mention of what the first one is…..

  17. I don’t know anything about their penises, but Ottawa has more ass**les per acre than the rest of the world.

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